Well, the doctor’s visits have been done, the scans have been completed and I have the full story.

My knees are stuffed. To be exact the cartilage behind both of my knee caps has been completely worn out. To get fit, because I’d never really “done” exercise until I met Rob, I just did what Rob did to gain strength. But walking and climbing with a heavy pack obviously was not the right thing for me…It suits Rob with his strong legs, but not me.

So no walking for a long time, if ever; no sailing, so we’ve cancelled our plans to sail Dusky Dolphin to Tasmania; heaven only know how I’m going to deal with the stairs in our house.

I cry when I tell people this, or even when I think about it. The grief tugs at my belly in pain.

I know I’ll get over the grief, but will I ever be able to go for walks and sails again?